Andy Marte is the greatest of all time. It is believed by some that Marte is the reincarnation of both Babe Ruth and Willie Mays (despite Mays not being dead). There are many questions surrounding Marte's birth and when he was conceived but a more accurate question would be "When was he conceived of by man'?". Mankind has had Gods throughout history to help explain away things that can't be understood or that appear to be miraculous. So with that being said, is Marte a physical reality or is he myth conceived by man?

He is in fact real, birthed on the sands of ancient Greece as a half-God, half man hybrid. Andy Marte A.K.A "Noodles" was first introduced to baseball at the tender age of zero years old. Many men died at this particular exchange of base and ball and Marte's pure power was realized. Marte soon began is rapid climb into the MLB. Marte was traded to the Cleveland Indians from the Boston Red Sox due to the Red Sox's fear of his overwhelming power and him embarassing the other players because of his pure skill. Marte soon began his streak of consecutive MVP winning seasons starting with his career high 5 home runs in 2006. He continued his winning ways by slugging 3 long bombs in 2008 with a batting average of 1 million. Marte is currently unmarried, because no women can handle is "seed".


Haha, Marte sucks.